Sacred Nonsense Presents
Party Bunker Classic
The world's greatest tiki adventure golf tournament.
Register Now →It starts in the parking lot. Hawaiian shirts. Drinks before the first tee. A jet flyover. A t-shirt gun. Two-man scramble after that. Trust the juju.
Day Of
Schedule
On-Course
The Trials
Four contests. Four types of golfer. One chance to prove you belong.
Trial of Power
Thunderstick Trial
Hole 2
Longest drive. Must be in the fairway. This is not the hole to guide one out there. Tee it high. Let it go. Hope you warmed up before this.
Trial of Precision
Pinseeker's Trial
Holes 4, 8, 11, 14
Closest to the pin. You've got the number. Now stop second-guessing it. Pick your line and hit it.
Trial of Control
Arrow Trial
Hole 17
Straightest drive. Closest ball to the line. Start it where you want it. Then leave it alone. Any curve… that's on you.
Trial of Chaos
Grass Skimmer Trial
Hole 1
Shortest drive. Must be in play. Just enough to count. That's all it takes. You'll know it when you see it… And so will everyone else.
Post-Round
Awards & Honors
The Juju-Forged
Teams finishing below par.
Birdie-Free Fellowship
Survived without a single birdie.
Double King
Three or more double bogeys. Somehow still here.
The Unraked
Never entered a bunker. Suspicious.
Most Spirited
Men, Senior, Women. Chosen by Nick Valdovinos.
Last Place Prize
You earned it.
69th Registrant
A sacred honor. Ask Sam Foster.
Read Before You Swing
Rules of the Game
- 1 Two-person scramble. No handicaps.
- 2 Lowest total score wins.
- 3 Double bogey max — pick up after double, keep the pace.
- 4 Ties invoke the Dobberstein — alternate shot, best of three holes. You hit, your partner hits, back and forth until someone holes out. Win two holes, win the tournament. Named after Tommy Dobberstein, who it was invoked against in 2024. He won.
- 5 Senior tees require Steve Valdo's approval.
- 6 Ladies hit from women's tees. Everyone else from white tees.
- 7 OB: drop where it crossed + 2 strokes.
- 8 Hawaiian shirts encouraged. For juju.
* Bar cart may or may not appear. It does what it wants.
* Fix your divots or risk The Turf's Revenge.
* Food and drinks available for purchase after the round.
Secure Your Spot
Register
Fill out the form below. One submission per team. Capacity: 120 golfers.